Take a Deep Breath

Breathe on me, Breath of God, 
fill me with life anew, 
that I may love the way you love, 
and do what you would do. 

Breathe on me, Breath of God, 
until my heart is pure, 
until my will is one with yours, 
to do and to endure. *

Reading these two stanzas a few weeks ago brought a memory to mind.  Five years earlier, I started writing again. My nurse, Pat, helped me write down my thoughts as I dictated them to her. 

One day, I started to cook with frustration. I could not write.

Oh no! I grumbled to myself. Writers block is now my biggest obstacle. I can’t tackle the blank white screen in my head.

I rolled my eyes, “How can I write without struggling?”

Pat put away the pen she was holding and turned to fully face me, “Take a deep breath! You can do it!” She put her hand above my chest to mimic the rhythm of my breathing as my lungs rose and fell. “Take a deep breath. Focus,” she finger spelt in ASL.**

Furrowing my wild eyebrows, I mocked her words, “Take a deep breath?! I can’t breathe without the help of my vent. How can I take a deep breath?”

I felt utterly helpless. That led me down a path of lies that told me I was a total failure. This snowballed into thinking about all the other things I can’t do due to my disabilities.

Pat reminded me that taking a deep breath also means exhaling frustrations and doubts and inhaling inner strength and confidence.

That I can do… vent or no vent.

So, I am here to tell you today to take a deep breath,my reader friend. Always take a deep breath when you are feeling frustrated and stressed with your situation. If you feel like you can’t physically take a deep breath with your lungs (like me), take a mental “deep breath.” Read (or listen)to the song above and rest your mind for a moment.

Intentionally inhale words that comfort you the most and exhale all your stress and tension. Repeat as needed. 😊

*Breathe on Me, Breath of God. Words by Edwin Hatch, music by Robert Jackson. 

**American SignLanguage